Suthenisms

I love the very last part of this, for those of you dear folks who accept us for who we are.. bless your heart.. for those of you that just don't get it.. well... bless your po little heart too!
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Suthen-isms:
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Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a
conniption fit, and that you don't HAVE them, you PITCH them.
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Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens,
peas, beans, etc., make up a mess.
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Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of
yonder.
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Only a Southerner knows exactly how long directly is, As in: 'Going to
town, be back directly.'
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Even Southern babies know that Gimme some sugar is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the
middle of the table.
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All Southerners know exactly when by and by is. They might not use the
term, but they know the concept well.
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Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace
for a neighbor who's got trouble is a whole messa fried chicken and a
big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real
crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!
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Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between right near and a right far piece. They also know that just down the road a piece can be anywhere from 1 to 20 miles.
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Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po white trash.
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A Southerner knows that the word fixin can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
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Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ... And when
we're 'in line,' we talk to everybody!
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Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're
related, even if only by marriage.
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In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
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Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
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Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are
perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and
that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
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When you hear someone say, 'I caught myself lookin'', you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
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Only true Southerners say sweet tea and sweet milk. Sweet tea indicates
the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened.
'Sweet milk' means you don't want buttermilk.
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And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old
ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say, 'well, bless her
heart' and go on your way.
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And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all
this Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they're fixin' to
have classes on Southernness as a second language!
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And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long
time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads 'I
ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could..'
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Now...... Shugah, send this to someone who was raised in the South or
wish they had been and If you're a Northern transplant, Bless y'alls
heart. We know you got here as fast as you could.